manic:

hustlerose:

you’re ugly you’re disgusting i’m gonna kill you give me $200 

my landlord every month

jungwildeandfree:

systlin:

But seriously, if alien PLANTS ever show up, citrus and oaks are going to be trying to breed with them IMMEDIATELY. 

We make fun of ourselves for being willing to fuck aliens, but I guarantee you that citrus and oaks are right there with us, aggressively trying to cross-pollinate with any new and interesting conquests. 

all this time, the real whores were the lemons, not the women who stole them 

boopednose:

thexfiles:

thexfiles:

as a society we have to start bullying rich ivy league kids more. they’re like “i go to harvard” and you gotta be like “what? never heard of it”

i got a lot of shit about this post a few days ago but ever since that scandal broke? crickets

“I have a degree from yale”

“Psh did your MOM buy it for you?”

ageostrophic:

me: *venting about my job*

someone: why don’t you just quit then

me: 

autumnj0y:

I’m both pro herbal medicine and pro vaccination because you can treat burns with aloe vera juice and sore throats with lavender infused honey but you can’t rid a country of polio with plants. 

zanabism:

zanabism:

that actor from full house bribed USC officials so her White-Mediocrity™ instagram star daughter could get into college and: 

this is the funniest thing i’ve ever seen 

parks-and-rex:

The internet is losing its collective mind over these adorable new cat paw cups that have been released by Starbucks China. The cups feature double walls so that the inner shape looks like a cat’s paw dipping into the cup, as well as a cute cherry blossom design on the outer glass.

The cups were only just released on Tuesday, but there have already been reports of arguments and even fistfights in various Starbucks locations across China as collectors try to score one for themselves. These adorable cups are also available online for a limited time, get yours HERE.